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Jealousy


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Jealousy


...::: Jealousy :::...

Photography: Logan Norton

Marya- As a part of the Scarlet Crow Remembrance project, Carmen and I have been excited about the use of photography to tell stories about feminine healing. As such, one of the major issues we both see within the sisterhood is Jealousy. In our culture there is a widespread emphasis put on beauty standards - mix that with biological templates of survival, the need to attract and keep a mate - mix that with an emotionally broken and immature society: the outcome becomes some pretty deeply ingrained imprints for the female spirit to navigate trust and love with other women. So many women I speak with have shared that one of their great healing challenges is to heal this wound of trust with the feminine; to transform the experiences of betrayal and the old stories of competition. Beyond catiness and distrust, there is a yearning and pain. Personally I have gone through many layers of healing around this subject. Art is one of the ways that supports me in exploring this terrain. This photography project being an example. We wanted to create a series of pics that exercised the process of jealousy- moving from competition to collaboration; from comparison to inspiration and support.

 

Carmen- At a very young age- I noticed that there was a trend in women that did not always entail honesty and trust. I watched women around me say one thing to ones face and then say something else when they were not around. I actually questioned this- asking my Aunt "Why does Grandma always talk about you when you are not around and you talk about Grandma when she is not around?" I was asking innocently as a child does and was genuinely curious. I was trying to figure out adults and human behavior- noticing the areas that naturally did not make sense to me and then asked questions to gain more understanding of this new world my spirit was inhabiting. Funny thing is- is that I got in trouble for speaking the truth and revealing areas where adults were not being truthful. This was one of many experiences that lead me to "quiet my voice". In the creative community- especially between women- I saw this pattern repeating and this lead me to become a stand for honoring ourselves and each other in a transparent and truthful way. This is how Womynz Voice emerged to create a platform where there were no "backstabbing" comments welcome and ALL women were encouraged to learn from each other and lift each other up. There was an inherent fear that your sister is gonna talk badly about you behind your back and instead of feeding this fear- I wanted to start a conversation for women to express similar experiences- to feel safe, seen and celebrated and ultimately change the old way of how we relate with each other. 

 

Marya- I remember an experience I had going to a specific gathering called Tribal Convergence a few years ago. My heart exploded open into acceptance and love. The women at this gathering were all such powerhouses- each queens in their own right, supporting, loving and rejoicing the beauty in each other. It was one of the first times I felt really held and uplifted by a group of female peers, and the experienced changed my life. It helped me remember that there is something sacred in the bond of sisterhood. I got really curious about how to embody this in all of my relationships, and create opportunities to circle with women to set new templates.  I hold a prayer that there is more and more unity amongst us all. That we may lift each other out of the vicious cycles of shame and fear-based cultural trances, perpetuating destructive forms of jealousy. I am really interested in uncovering the roots of this, and opening the space of dialogue to expose where the collective wound is so we can nurture and heal our relationships with one another. Its such a precious and tender time in our world- we really need each other at our best and most vibrant. There isn't time for the subtle viscousness, divisiveness and disempowerment caused by illusions of separateness. Its a leak in the cauldron of the magical feminine.  And its going to take all of us to repair and patch it up. May we continue to grow in our capacity to celebrate and share our unique magic with each other.

 

Carmen- I see clearly that "main stream" media perpetuates jealousy and competition amongst sisters. We see it on many game shows like The Bachelor, Dating Naked, A Shot At Love, etc. Also the "main stream" music, as I hear it, encourages women to cut each other down and wonder how these models will influences my nieces and all young people exposed to pop culture. For example "Stupid Hoe" by Nikki Minaj, "Don't Cha" by Pussy Cat Dolls and "Better Than Revenge" by Taylor Swift have played repeatedly on speakers that surround us. Many of us can filter this out through empowered choice, but I think about the youth who may lack positive role models that teach discernment and subsequently may learn unhealthy behaviors through the media bombarding the human spirit. Along with these popular female artists broadcasting female-female competition, there are many more songs that empower women like "Flawless" by Beyonce, "Beautiful" by Christina Aguilera, "I'm Every Woman" by the late Whitney Houston, etc.

Along with the mixed emotions within us, come mixed messages where the healthiest examples of female empowerment can be overlooked by infectious pop singles that blast catty hooks that our young girls learn before they can learn about self-love and genuine sisterhood. The people are ready for deep, rumbling, soul-awakening truth. We don't want to hurt each other anymore. We don't stand behind fame seeking sisters that throw the ones that lifted them up under the metaphorical bus in a broken heart beat. We want to trust each other. We want to learn from each other. We want to feel safe in our love for each other. And we want it now. 


Marya- Thinking about jealousy leads me always to roots, and big impact social change periods of divisiveness. We talk about this in our other writing about 'Hammer of Witches.' The systematic destruction of the village to bring in structures of ownership, and the used of terror based modalities to divide and conquer amongst the living folk. How does this 200 years of intense antagonizing, physical torture, and reformation still impact the fabrics of our relating? Starhawk wrote an amazing book called 'Dreaming the Dark' where she talks about the value of women circling together, sharing different practices for building trust, community and intimacy amongst sisterhood. In it she wrote a chapter outlining the impact of the burning times, reviewing the history and its implications. What I got most out of it was this feeling that the more we heal and reweave with on another, the stronger the resolve to be in a harmonious relation with all life will bring about the revolution our world yearns for. And it is already happening. I'm floored by the companies calling out the beauty standards, and moving towards acceptance, co-creation and celebration of personhood. 


Carmen- Now is a time where we can all harness our own beliefs and desires to heal this gap between sisters. We are stronger in unity and this is a threat to corporate companies that make money off the insecurities of women as well as governments that constantly do everything to keep us disempowered, afraid and reliant upon them to survive. Well, times are definitely changing and many of us are awakened to the power within and we continue to share this with whom ever will listen. We return to building communities and find strength in numbers. We listen more to ourselves and each other, honestly and vulnerably and we are learning quickly that we all share the same pain caused by jealousy, comparison and competition.

Women are extremely powerful. When we have each others back, we are a force to be reckoned with. I believe strongly that the messages pushed in our faces to compete with each other are to weaken the power that comes from us when we are unified and lifting each other up. The Dalai Lama quoted that "The world will be saved by the western women", I believe he is affirming the potency of caring, fierce women working together in unity. I will add to this quote that ALL women have the ability to save this world but not until we put down our arms and begin accepting our true selves, forgiving each other to build whole-hearted trust again. It starts here. As one, we are unstoppable. 

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Hammer of Witches


Hammer of Witches


...::: Hammer of Witches :::...

 

Marya- 'This song is about remembering the witch trials, and feeling into the collective trauma regarding this period of history.

I am currently mining my own psyche regarding this topic, doing research about the logistics of the witch burnings, and the connection with the rise of capitalism. I have been deeply inquiring as to how this is still echoing in the fabric of society today. Curious where you feel this? In our relationships? In social gender equality? In how disconnected our society seems to be with the rhythms of nature? In our fear of speaking our truth?

There is a lot that comes up for me around this song.: The transition in society at this time was such that we were moving away from commonwealth land to land ownership. From villages being free to live off the foods produced in the forests, and the livelihood they could make as sovereign from government to needing permission and money in order to sustain themselves. It seems it was a big leap into indentured servitude of the ruling bodies. It definitely still reeks havoc today. Its a lot for me to integrate, and i realize i still have a lot to learn and come to terms with in my own soul's remembrance. Still learning the facts and historical implications, and noticing in myself where i can grow into being able to move forward from a place of integrity given all the various threads woven in the subject matter.

This track is a part of a collection of songs I’ve been cooking called ‘Scarlet Moon Chronicles’- a peek into remembering this aspect of our soul. So many people I know feel connected to, or a spark of somatic remembrance to being burned alive. Its a potent topic. Past life regression- what is that? Is it an individual experience? A remembrance of soul groups who incarnated at different times and have access to somatic memories? Somethings else? I hope to continue to use this music as a bridge to invite in more wisdom about the subject, as I am not entirely sure myself. Only that the songs that are coming are pointing towards a part of the story, and I'm doing my best to catch it. 

May we continue to heal the collective trauma of systematic executions around the world. I would love to see more public mournings and tributes for this time… and for all the other historical grief we carry in our cells. Whatever it takes to change the story. May we grow strong in reweaving the magical feminine, calling upon our capacity and willingness to recode the spheres of human consciousness with maximum light, grace and wisdom.'

 

 

Carmen:  When I was a little girl, I remember seeing a movie about Joan of Arc. It was the one made in 1957 starring Jean Seberg. I remember watching the scene when she was burned and feeling so confused by this. I didn't understand why anyone would burn another human being, let alone such a brave woman. Also, there was a feeling inside of me that was more than confusion. It literally hurt inside. I felt pain, shame, powerlessness...feelings far too mature for any child to understand.

I believe the intensity of these feelings as a child related to my own memories of being burned in other lifetimes. Wow- this is a ballsy share for the internet. But none-the-less, my honest experience. As I grew older, I began to relate and resonate with soul reincarnation- in a more open minded sense that the soul is eternal, regardless of religious beliefs. I reveal now, I have actually had a few past life regressions, where I was killed for being who I naturally was; a female that was in touch with an earthly and celestial magic of healing and seeing. These regressions were un-induced by any substance and I was fully awake and present whilst having them.

When I first witnessed Marya Stark's incredibly powerful song "Hammer of Witches" I was blown away! I had rolling chills, chicken skin all over my body. My soul was remembering/relating to her story. An indescribable knowing and feeling of anger, sadness, mourning mixed with the relief that I was not the only one who remembered. If you think about it, there were 6 generations of human beings (mostly women) that were violently killed or burned for being labeled "witches." Most of these women were innocent light workers or herbal healers.

Someone who worked in harmony with the earth and natural cycles. Someone with strong intuition. A seer. A live wire, so to speak. A medicine person. Not all worked with the light but many did. The book "Malleus Maleficarum" meaning "Hammer of Witches" in Latin, was a book that gave instruction on how to torture women to confess they were "witches" and also to turn in their beloved sisters or brothers. It was a manipulative, un-loving book that once printed, became the literature and handbook that caused the death of many innocent healers. At the time, it was the 2nd most popular book next to the Bible.

The fear and the craze of that time brought an intense, mass genocide that we faintly brush over in history as "The Witch Burnings"....I wonder, have we ever considered the trauma that still echoes in the collective from these massive, un-loving acts based on fear??? How many of you have been afraid to fully be YOU, shine YOUR bright light or reveal YOUR gifts? Could this feeling be an inherent memory of when you may have died for being your powerful self in another life? Even if you don't believe in soul reincarnations and past lives, how would you react to the truth that this is happening somewhere in the world right now? Innocent people being killed out of fear. Is this pattern still happening because we have not, as a collective, honored all the innocent lives lost from the past? When does it end?

This song, written by Marya Stark, in my opinion, is an artistic, powerful step in the right direction of acceptance and healing. It's a controversial topic to sing about and I am honored to share in this voice with her in honor of all the souls that lost their earthly bodies to fire, including the courageous Joan of Arc. For the souls of the innocent who died then and continue to die now at the hand of fear, I share this with intentions to catalyze the collective healing/forgiveness/justice process for that time and ALL times. Thank you Mar for being the conduit for this essential message to be heard.

 

Hammer of Witches

'You told me of a night the water would not run hot
and she brought in a pot for the bath, it was boiling at the brim
an accident, the scalding water spilled unlocking secrets in
souls memories released in screams as it touched your skin
all at once the burning flooded your mind, back to a time
when women were burned, matches were struck as the clock struck noon
townfolk gathered to see you bloom
to see you bloom, bloom in the flames of
what would become of those who practiced magic
what would become of those who knew the ways of the moon
and these, the memories, seeds laid in our fertile minds,
of tragedies, screams sounding in the halls of the time

Hammer of witches, Pounding, Pounding
Hammer of witches, Burning alive
Hammer of witches, Merging as One with the Light
Malleus Maleficarum

I was there too in that time of darkness and fire
I clearly recall seeing your delicate face that day in the crowd
I was exemplified, tied and nude, high high upon the pyre
The sound of the wood was incredibly loud
I remember the look in her eyes as the old woman stared
I remember the sun reflecting in her granddaughters hair,
I remember the sweet smell of bay leaves on the wind
carrying the prayers we made at the chalice well and the spirits therein

And he was there too, watching the scene with such countenance
this man we both knew, biblically, a lord of the old ways,
a figure of dreams, denouncer of craft, denouncer of providence
adept at spinning his wheels to feed off the craze

Hammer of witches, Pounding, Pounding
Hammer of witches, Burning alive
Hammer of witches, Merging as One with the Light
Malleus Maleficarum

in his mind, held he the sacred blade 
a dagger carved of crystal stone
into your side, he thrust and contact he made
but still you avenged my death in blood and bone

Sister my sister, the flames that we took
the stakes they were wrought by the moon cream we caught
Sister my sister, the cages we shook
the fortunes we sought, the fruits were all rot
Sister my sister, the armor we wear
the burden we bear, the love we left there
Sister my sister, the stories we tell
in ashes we fell, in ashes we fell

in flames we did rise and in ashes we fell
consumed by the heat as we cast our last spell
engulfed in the flames  at the sound of the bell
in ashes we fell, in ashes we fell
we merged with the light and the darkness did tell
the darkness did tell, the darkness did  tell
the song of the night still heard by the well
In ashes we fell, in ashes we fell

Malleus Maleficarum
Malleus Maleficarum

The Hammer of witches
The Hammer of witches
The Hammer of witches
The Hammer of witches'